Moodz : Disfunctional

I am disfunctional today.

(Now I can pen my inner thoughts for I have changed my weblink and I guess I am as annonymous as I can be)

101 things crossed my mind yesterday. And it dawned to me that there could be a twist, more than I have expected.

It just came to my mind that he may have heard something unsightly and cancelled his trip because of anger, dissapointment etc? Last thursday, we were still conversing normally.

Suddenly he is avoiding me completely. And the pang of pain felt is almost unbearable.

Unbearable not to know what the real reasons are.

Once of the rare occasions where I didn’t sleep a blink, was up and about by 7am. Chanted for an hour to calm my nerves. Yet, the wait is almost unbearable.

I can’t help but think that maybe someone split some bad milk on me.

I am so scared of the world now. It is so dark and unknown to me.

I am shaking all over inside me.

Tears are all clogged up, not a single drop is shedded.

I am torn all apart inside, pieces only held on by a weave of thin string.

** Pain in her eyes as she stares into emptiness.