See. Listen. Smell. Feel.

Michael Jackson 1958 – 2009.

Not really because of the media, but more of my reminiscence from all the years (in fact almost all my life), I have been thinking and reading up a lot about Michael. And of course, listening to his songs. It disgusted me how much my perception over the years has been molded by what the media has orchestrated. I recalled though when I was young, I could never get enough watching the video of Thriller and listening to Beat It.

After reading up about his life, I do feel his pain. Being someone having so much to give and I guess wanting perfection, Michael sadly had a couple of unfortunately incidents in his life which I believed, combined with the pressure of the media drove him till the tipping point.

Michael didnt yearn to be white. He had no choice because he was suffering from a chronic skin decease called Vitiligo which causes depigmentation in patches on his skin. The common treatment use for patients suffering from Vitiligo lightens the skin tones which explained why Michael became all of a sudden, almost a white man. It wasn’t his choice. I recalled now, that I read in the media during that period reporting on MJ’s crazy complete body skin tattoo to transform himself which was of course bollocks. I think these untrue remarks about Michael hurted him a lot. He is still human, maybe even a very sensitive one in emotions due to all the limelights and expectations of his gift.

Across different years, Michael also had couple of accidents. One where he broke his nose during a practise. He had to undergo numerous rhinoplasty as the accident had him with difficulties in breathing which can be quite an obstacle for his singing career. That explains why he had to had the multiple nose job done. And so very often, we see how the media sneer at the fallen nose etc. He also, during a Pepsi Cola commercial filming, endured a second degree burn on his scalp when his hair caught fire.

I think as a public figure, physical appearence must be very key. I would if it was me to be perfect for the world. I do not mean to yearn to be the most beautiful or a having killer bod, but to be myself, my perfect self. Definately I would not wish for patching skin due to Vitiligo, but again, if sickness/ accidents bears upon us, what can we do? Karma.

I know its a lot of pain for Michael, maybe we will never know how much. But I wished or I had hoped that he had taken another path and not succumbing to all the weight in the world which is in the end insignificant, except for the deterioration to your dear self.

Somehow I think all that took toll on him and drove im down the road to perfection of his physical self which also causes mental stress.

BCC made a slideshow – ‘Michael Jackson – man & music’. I hear him. I feel a sensitive man.

And also, what I didn’t realise is that not only Michael sang about the helping the world, he really did try to help too. Thru different charities for different purposes.

I know, I only talked about the goodness. We had also heard throughout the years, some terrible stories about Michael. I do not judge because I do not have the right to. Its his life. But I believe, deep down in everyone there is certainly exist goodness. Question is, how do we manifest this goodness (potential)?

Oh, but Michael, you have given so much to us! Thank you and rest in peace.

Watch this! Beautiful! It gives me a fuzzy warm feeling (and close to tears)… What a priceless moment! I wish I was there, caught in that moment.

Music brings joy to everyone. Dancing unite people from all walks of life. So inspiring, isn’t it? I wanna dance too!

Coincidentally, in the last Youth Benelux Trets, we spoke about starting a dancing group in SGI Belgium since culture has been always played a big part in SGI activities worldwide.

Btw, these quirks are really some of my favourite things in Belgium! It happens quite a lot here and there, unexpected things that people do which bring smiles to our faces.

I really really like this song! By Miriam Makeba, a south african singer.

May 1, 2009 – Trets, France

Hello Everybody!

My name is Jaymy. I am from Belgium and originally from Malaysia. It is an honour to be able to share my experience with you today. When my leader Kathy asked me if I could share an experience during Trets, I didn’t even have a moment of hesitation because actually she reminded me of a determination I made not too long ago when I was faced with some very great challenges.

Just a little background about myself – I am almost a fortune baby as my father encountered this Buddhism and took up faith when I was about 6 years old. He contracted cancer at the age of 42 and I was about 13 years old then. The cancer was in an advance stage and therefore maximum treatment had to be done. He survived though suffered from many side effects of the radiation and chemotherapy treatments. In fact, that episode was an important turning point for my whole family especially my sister, brother and I who started taking up this practise seriously.

Well, life went on for my father despite many physical pain and limited mobility but he also never saw a doctor ever since then.

Almost 16 years had passed and many persuasions, in 2007 he finally went for a check up. The doctors discovered a tumor at the spine area and immediately scheduled him for a surgery. The night before the surgery, my dad ‘ran away’ from the hospital because the patient in the bed next to him died that night and that totally freaked him out. Looking back, fortunately he made that escape but I will explain to you why later.

Last summer, my dad had to go to the doctor because he had a sore and it wouldn’t heal for weeks. Two days before I arrived home for my vacation, he got admitted into the hospital because from the sore the doctors discovered high blood pressure, high diabetes level, almost non-functioning kidneys, a hole in his bladder which can cause deadly infection and also the unknown tumor.

It was a scary moment for me to be facing this situation again. So I chanted and chanted really hard and suddenly all the past convictions, victories and experiences came rolling back to me.

Life had been very challenging since my father fell sick but took all good turns so far. With Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, we can make all the impossibles possible!

So, as I shared before, the stubborn wound which wouldn’t heal has been really a blessing in disguise. Because it got him into the hospital and it got him to meet with the right doctor.

With so many complications, we were very lucky to meet a doctor with a lot of compassion and wisdom. So, instead of going ahead immediately with the
operation, this doctor recommended that the first step to take is to insert some temporary tubes to support the kidneys in order to revive them so that my father can be stronger to go through the big operation.

The doctor told me, everything is about timing and to do the right things at the right time. To me, good timing means in need of plenty good fortune.

On the other hand, the doctor also told me that my dad is a very sick man and the chances of him surviving without the operation is 0% and with the operation is 50% which truly scared the hell out of me.

I was very grateful to the members in my hometown for organising marathon chanting sessions for my father. It is very encouraging to see the tremendously amount of people who cared and came to participate.

In my prayers, I prayed firstly to repay gratitude to my father who was the one to bring this wonderful Buddhism into our lives and through his sufferings, we have all learnt so much from. This has been my number 1 prayer for years – for my father to be able to lead a fulfilling life, free of pain and to be able to walk with ease.

Secondly, to be repay gratitude to the practise by achieving another victory and action proof for kosenrufu. Therefore, I made a promise to myself to share my experience in Trets.

As for my father, he was really in fear, totally discouraged and all that is on his mind is, “This is the end of me”. Actually my biggest challenge during that time is to encourage him and bring him back to believe in faith and in himself and his mission in life. I told him, “Buddhism teaches that it is a slander not to take action for our health. You have not seen any doctors for years but now the time has come. Let’s take this like a second chance and truly fight in order to be able to continue living a fulfilling life. You have overcame so much obstacles in life with faith and therefore, has so much to share with others who are suffering as well. Besides, Sensei is 80 years old and he is still making a difference. You are only 60, easily; you could have more than 20 years to live a good life! I believed through my chanting I found the courage to say these things to my father. And somehow, it worked so he started chanting with more determination.

So, a week after the insertion, then the plan was to go ahead with the operation but luckily, few days before there were some disagreements between the doctors. So, the ‘shoten zenjin’ doctor again suggested that instead of immediately doing the operation, a biopsy should be performed on this tumor to find out whether is it cancerous.

But instead, tuberculosis was diagnosed. What a great relief!

In fact, the tumors are formed to contain the TB bacteria. So the inactive TB bacteria have probably been in latent state for years in his body. But the bacteria can become active again and attack the body whenever the immune system becomes weakened example after an operation. He wouldn’t have survived if the operation has gone ahead! And now, he didn’t need any operation to remove the tumors as Tubercolosis can be treated with long term medication instead.

But we have yet to win the battle, as there was still a few other issues to be resolve through an operation

A week later the operation took place. It was supposed to take about 6 hours but 2 hours later, he was out. Apparently, the sore was really minor and the doctors have decided not to go ahead with the entire operation as it wasn’t as time critical anymore. Therefore they wanted my father to be stronger and free of Tuberculosis before attempting the major operation.

Which was really a good news! But unfortunately it didn’t last long as when my father woke up, he wasn’t behaving normal. Day after day, he became more and more disorientated and constantly in hallucination. He needs 24 hours care. I was truly afraid that this state will be permanent and also as he was admitted to a private hospital, the bill was growing to a crazy amount which I was not sure how we can pay it eventually. Besides, even though it was extremely difficult, I had to come back to Belgium because I had used up all my holidays and had to get back to work.
One day, a senior leader came to visit my father. He reminded us of the Gosho, Reply to Kyo’o: “Believe in this mandala with all your heart. Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo is like a roar of a lion, what sickness can be an obstacle?”. Then he gave strict guidances to us. He told us that we cannot let this continue on, we need to be 300% determined to overcome this as a family in itai doshin now. Then he invited everyone in the room to chant together with all their might for 5 minutes. My brother told me it was so powerful and he had goose bumps throughout. My father who didn’t sleep a wink for 21 days, felt asleep the next day and woke 2 days after. He was totally normal again.

Now, almost 8 months later, in his last check-up (which he now follows religiously), he has completed his Tuberculosis medication, the tumors has reduced in size and miraculously, the hole in the bladder has apparently closed up. So for now, there is no need to go through the operation.

Two months ago, we also managed to get reimbursement from the insurance company for all expenses incurred.

There are still many challenges that lie ahead, but knowing that we have Nam-myoho-renge-kyo and no prayers will go unanswered, I look forward everyday to living life to the fullest, making a difference to others and whenever I am down, I remember the past victories and be inspired to stand up again. Nothing is impossible, we just have to dare to dream and have complete trust in faith.

I hope this sharing has inspired you as much as it did for me again.

Thank you!

Mar 30 -- Apr 2, ‘09 -- Nairobi, Kenya

Kenya, with its capital city in Nairobi, is a country in East Africa. It has a population of about 38 mio. The main languages are Swahili and English. I think most of us may know Kenya for its wonderous wildlife reserves (safaris) with thousand and thousand types of animals.

But well, as usual, I was there for a business trip so no safari or anything like that. Just hours and endless hours of taxi rides to and fro conference centre and my hotel. Traffic is a nightmare. And pollution as well. But warmth and beauty of the people made me forget it all.

That’s when I realised how important is education, not only to elevate lives of people out of poverty but also for the sake of environment. Awareness is key.

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Oh, one sleepy morning, as I was resting my head against the window of the taxi, trying to take a nap knowing the long ride ahead, at a rather busy junction in the city centre, we came side by side with a school bus fully loaded with energetic primary school children. They were climbing over the seats, tugging at each others hair, chatting, singing and whole lot of activities going on. Suddenly a boy saw me. He got really excited and started tugging at his friends for attention but none who took noticed of him.

As we were turning the opposite direction, going out of sight, I heard a loud shrill cry, “CHINESE!”. I looked back, lo and behold, the entire bus was staring at me. I even thought people on the street paused for a second. Then all of us in the taxi started laughing.

Priceless.

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I learnt to love this song and to sing it too -- Malaika, means “Angel” in Swahili.